New York Magazine’s Sex Diaries Analyzed

There was an excellent article in New York Magazine by Wesley Yang that I think my readers would enjoy. It’s called A Critical (But Highly Sympathetic) Reading of New Yorkers’ Sexual Habits and Anxieties. As much as Washington would like to downplay its sexual habits, sex is alive and well in the District, although not so much in my own life, as I’ve been taking a break from the bliss and heartache of romance for almost two years. The many political sex scandals show what is lurking just below the surface in Washington. Whether it’s a Governor called-to- Washington who calls a prostitute to visit him at the Mayflower Hotel, a Senator looking for a quicky in an airport men’s room, or even the President of the United States taking advantage of a star-struck White House intern, sex –as much as power–seems to make the world go ’round.

Washingtonian magazine tried to create a similar  DC version of NY Magazines Sex Diaries, which they toned down and called Dating Diaries, which wasn’t as racy or entertaining. They asked me to participate, but I wasn’t interested. I think what makes the Sex Diaries so informative, is that its anonymous so those participating can be more open.

I think my readers will be able to relate to this article, as it highlights how much dating has changed with texting, Facebook, and other social media including an iPhone app called Grindr. According to Yang, “It’s a GPS-enabled social-networking service for gay men. It tells you how many feet away a possible hookup is standing. Each profile comes with a picture, a tagline, the relevant stats, and a declaration of interest. You scroll through a column of heads and torsos arranged in descending order of proximity, tapping on the ones that seem promising and chatting with the ones who want the same things you do. As you make your way through the city, the menu of men reshuffles, and the erotic terrain updates in real time.” Not sure if it works in DC or if it’s just a NYC thing.

Social media has definitely made it much more efficient to find love, but it has also made it way more easy to cheat. Yang’s article quotes one of the NYM diarist’s who is conflicted and overwhelmed by all his options on any given night, “12:32 p.m. I get three texts. One from each girl. E wants oral sex and tells me she loves me. A wants to go to a concert in Central Park. Y still wants to cook. This simultaneously excites me—three women want me!—and makes me feel odd.”  What is the guy to do? I guess a true player would take advantage of all three women in one evening. Take a look at the article, and feel free to comment as to your thoughts. And as always, feel free to Ask Miss A!

- Miss A