Thoughts on Death and Dying

Until last Friday, I had been blessed never to have witnessed death first hand.  I feel really blessed that Gatsby waited until I got home to die. It would have been so much harder to come home and find him dead.  I would have felt so guilty for not having been there to pet, kiss and comfort him as he died. I’m also blessed that I didn’t have to make a decision to put him down. Even though it might have been the best choice, I still would have felt guilty.

Death is ugly. It surprised me how quickly the body goes from embodying a living creature to something inanimate. It goes from being warm and still seeming like that creature to something cold, decomposing and nothing at all like the creature. I guess what I realized is that “Gatsby” who I loved so deeply wasn’t just a little fluffy white fur ball. In the end, “Gatsby” was and is his spirit, and the memories of all the love, support and smiles he gave to me over the years.

I was thinking that we all spend so much time, money and energy on our physical bodies and appearance.  We get highlights, spray tans and botox; wear the latest fashion and the cutest shoes; and buy make-up and eye cream. But in the end, none of that matters.  If we are blessed to live a long life, we lose our youth and our beauty fades.

In the end, we aren’t measured by the wealth we’ve gained or what we’ve accomplished in our careers.  We are measured and remembered for by who we were as people. In most eulogies, we remember what an individual did to help others, his or her philosophy on life, and humorous stories encapsulating the individual’s personality.

I have also realized that life is short. My dog lived a decade, which flew by. Some children aren’t blessed to live even that long. And a long life isn’t promised to any of us. In Washington, we all seem to be Type A and are constantly on our blackberries and rushing to multiple events each evening. Our friends in cities like Denver seem to take things at a slower pace, and are more focused on where they are hiking or skiing on the weekend. We spend so much of our focus on being productive, climbing the corporate or social ladders that I feel like we don’t just relax and enjoy.  I am going to make an effort to step back a bit from some of my obligations, and spend more time enjoying my family, close friends and things I enjoy but never seem to have time for like tennis and reading.

These are just some thoughts I wanted to share. I urge you to leave a comment if you feel so inclined.

- Miss A